8 Questions Every Bride & Groom Will Get Sick Of Hearing
Let’s face it, in the run up to (and during) your wedding day, there will be plenty of questions you need to answer. Whether it’s deciding what kind of nuptials you want to have, planning the details or significant life choices like moving in with your spouse, it’s likely to be a time of constant demands.
In light of that, it’s unavoidable that you will want to tear your hair out at some point after being asked for the 164th time whether you prefer vanilla icing or chocolate sponge.
Here are 8 questions every bride and groom will be sick of hearing by the time the big day arrives:
1. ‘When is the wedding?’
If you are newly engaged, this is a particularly annoying question as it triggers pressure at a time when you’re only just getting used to the idea of being a future wife/husband. Just let the pair enjoy their engagement for five minutes before shooing them down the aisle!
2. ‘Did you know he was going to propose?’
Whether you knew it was coming or not, being asked this question kind of zaps the magic out of the moment. Who cares? You’ve both made a big life decision, it’s not relevant whether you had a suspicion it was going to happen or not.
3. ‘Are you excited for the big day?’
Of course. But we’re also stressed, apprehensive, overwhelmed, or simply want it to be a simple affair with no drama. Repeatedly being asked about our enthusiasm ahead of the ‘big day’ is a sure quick way to dampen said enthusiasm.
4. ‘Have you planned the honeymoon?’
If we have, then it was on top of our already long list of plans that we’re probably sick of talking about. If not, we’ve now been reminded about another thing that needs to be organised and financed. Hurrah!
5. ‘Are you really ready to settle down?’
By most people’s standards this is an inapproriate question, but that doesn’t stop people from asking it! Our decision to get married is our own and having people question our commitment before we’ve even said ‘I do’ is at best uncomfortable and at worst, plain rude.
6. ‘What will happen with your job/house/pet?’
Engagements take place under many different circumstances. Some brides-and-grooms-to-be may still live alone, some have kids, successful careers, are divorced or have been co-habiting for a long time. No matter what the life circumstances, there is no ‘right’ way to conduct a marriage after the ceremony and these practical decisions are not something couples want to be grilled about repeatedly. Also, it’s pretty archaic and frustrating for a woman to be asked if she will quit her job once she’s married, but it does happen. (Speaking for the majority, no, we won’t. It’s not 1954.)
7. ‘Are you going to have kids straight away?’
This presumptious and invasive question is sure to be asked by friends, relatives and long lost aunts at least a few times during the course of your wedding planning. Firstly, a couple’s reproductive behaviour is a highly personal affair. Second, let two people enjoy their engagement and time as newlyweds before interrogating them about expanding their family. And third, why assume that they even want children?
8. ‘Are you going to change your name?’
Old habits die hard, and it’s likely you will be asked this on more than one occasion. Maybe you haven’t even thought about it yet, or maybe you want to keep your name but don’t want to make a song and dance about it. Whatever you choose, it’s something that should be decided based on personal preference rather then social expectation. It won’t stop some people asking, though! (We’re looking at you, Great Aunt Liz).
What questions are you and your spouse tired of being asked ahead of your wedding?
By Abby Williams, Excalibur Press